Noted industrialist Winfield Root's wish to create an atomic powered transcontinental train service comes to fruition with the maiden voyage of Supertrain. It has a disco, a gym, a salon, a pool, and a weird babyman for a concierge. Not that any of this matters to Mike Post (guest star Steve Lawrence), a junior agent trying to secure a role for his boss' client (special guest star Vicki Lawrence). He also owes 40 large to Big Ed back in Los Angeles, and someone may have put a hit on out him. Will he survive the Express ... to terror? Also guest starring Don Meredith and Fred "The Hammer" Williamson.
Sarah Madden and Seth Linker join Erik and Justin to experience the majesty of Supertrain. All fall over themselves to talk about the raw sexual magnetism of weird babyman Dave Noonan (Patrick Collins). Justin learns about Jon Peters' secret origin and the movie Shampoo. Seth defines the word "barbicide." Passenger Jack Fisk (Don Stroud) easily wins Most Valuable Character thanks to his suspenders, comb-over, and constant cigar. Erik cannot keep the name "George Hamilton" in his mind. Sarah keeps the gang on the tracks even as the Supertrain itself tries to fly off them.