That was one of the more popular shirts at San Diego Comic-Con in recent years.

If that name sounds familiar, it's because it should. He's kind of been in the news lately. You might have heard of a little movie called The Avengers. Or maybe The Cabin in the Woods? Two of the most critically acclaimed and commercially successful movies released in the last month. He co-wrote and produced Cabin and co-wrote and directed The Avengers, and in between production and post-production on that one, in his spare time, he gathered a few friends and filmed an adaptation of William Shakespeare's Much Ado about Nothing.

Let me repeat that.... in his spare time...

For those of you in the know, my last article was a shocking exposé on the link between vaccines and autism, wherein all of my collated data irrefutably proved---oh, wait. This is for Fanboy Comics…ok, right, then, my last article was If Superheroes Were More Realistic. I was recently reprimanded by a reader for not including any Marvel characters, but I assure you, I had my reasons:

  1.  I’m not as knowledgeable about the Marvel universe.

  2.  Marvel is already so much about covering all of the minutiae and the petty, everyday issues that their characters are faced with.

However, since I’ve never been someone who let my own ignorance or a simple numbered list keep me from running my mouth, I present the article that at least one of you has been waiting for: If Superheroes Were More Realistic---The Marvel Edition.

I recently acquired all four boxed sets of Batman: The Animated Series at a yard sale for $20. (It’s ok to be jealous.) Needless to say, I have since been watching the crap out of those DVDs. I’m sure most of you remember the show, but if you’re like me, you haven’t seen it since you were a kid. Well, I’m here to tell you that the show is just as good as you remember; nay, better. In fact, I come to you today with a bold proclamation: that the animated series version of Batman is the best version of Batman there is, and if you disagree, you are wrong.

I should probably mention up front that I don’t fully understand how arguments work.

Disclaimer: I will be comparing animated Batman to the more current and popular interpretations of Batman, since I shouldn’t have to explain why Adam West’s Batman or the Batman from Batman and Robin aren’t as cool. You should have no problem accepting that.

Superheroes are our modern-day myths, “living” legends of immense power whose exploits thrill and inspire us. In the midst of all this hero worship, though, it’s easy to forget that beneath the masks and the emblems is a real human/human-like alien/mutant with real thoughts and feelings. I say this, not as a reminder of the human frailties and emotional vulnerabilities that these living gods must deal with in private moments, but more to point out that these figures are not so different from you or me---which is why they should be screwing up much more often in stupid and embarrassing ways. Perhaps, in situations like these:

Hello, my name is Barbra, and I am in love with a geek.  

Star Wars, Firefly, Halo, Buffy, Preacher, Alien, Battlestar Galactica - these are all staples in my life, all of which have seeped into my movie/TV viewing schedule, my everyday conversations, and even my apartment decor.  Being in a relationship with a geek has expanded my artistic tastes and allowed me to be a part of a larger community, but, most importantly, it has provided me with the chance to connect with someone who holds these and other areas of fandom near and dear to his heart.  For the throngs of men and women who may be longing for similar relationship bliss this Valentine’s Day, I submit to you the following suggestions for finding love with a geek (or coming to terms with your geek-tastic significant other).  

As is the case with many young children, I was fairly obsessed with dinosaurs at a young age. I was so obsessed, in fact, that Tyrannosaurus Rex quickly became my personal hero and could do no wrong. T-Rex killed a herbivore? A guy’s gotta eat! T-Rex has small arms? That’s the way he wants it! T-Rex is fighting Triceratops? Ain’t no Triceratops walking away from this battle! Understandably, I was extremely upset upon my first viewing of King Kong (1933) when my boy, T-Rex, was brutally killed by the big, dumb ape. That day of my youth forever cemented both my distrust of large apes and my undying loyalty to the Tyrant Lizard. So, of course, it was a given that when my hero returned to the silver screen in 1993 (sans his big, hairy murderer) I was sold before he (She, actually, given that all the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park are female. I DID go around and lift up the dinosaur’s skirts!) crushed his first Ford Explorer. Obviously, I wasn’t the only one enamored with Steven Spielberg’s Jurassic Park considering the massive box office numbers it pulled in ($914,691,118 worldwide), the two sequels it spawned, and the fact that it bares sole credit for making Velociraptor a household name.

While furthering our knowledge of the origin and nature of theoretical physics, physicist Stephen Hawking has become one of the most vital scientific minds since Albert Einstein.  Hawking has accomplished revolutionary work on the existence of black holes and published multiple best-selling books on his scientific discoveries over the past 40 years.  Overcoming great professional and personal obstacles such as his battle with Lou Gehrig’s disease (ALS), Hawking earned legendary status among his fellow physicists with his notable endeavor to understand the universe.  With his most successful book, A Brief History of Time, he explained the evolution of his thinking about the cosmos for general audiences, earning him status as an accessible genius and a household name.  Hardly slowed by his battle with ALS, Hawking has continued his research into theoretical physics, written another book, and traveled the globe giving lectures to the general public.  

Hey Howdy, my lil' Fanboys and girls!  J.C. here and, with Con season getting under way, I thought I might give you the fun-down-run-down about being prepared and staying safe at your favorite Con!  I myself am looking forward to attending the upcoming Tekkoshocon in Pittsburgh, but this info can apply to any Con anywhere.  (Except space.  Space Con is dangerous and takes years to mentally prepare.)  Even if you're an experienced attendee, it's good to brush up on some of the particulars, and I'll have you going from Baka to Sempei in no time.

Cooking Mama Says: Just Like Making Souffle, Preparation is Key.

OK, so, you bought your ticket, booked your hotel (if needed), and you're ready to go, right?  Wrong!  You gotta plan.  Luke didn't just hop into an X-Wing and roll out guns a-blazing, did he?  No.  That would have been an Anakin move, and we all know how well that turned out.  So, here are a few tips to get your prepared for Battle Royale.

As the Fanboy Comics staff takes time to revel in the goodwill and merriment of the holiday season, I have found that there is no better time than now to celebrate the movie that encompasses the true meaning of Christmas: the 1988 Bill Murray classic, Scrooged.  Here are the top ten reasons that this gem remains number one in our hearts after all of these years:

10.  Whether you currently have a job (you lucky dog, you) or even if you’re hoping that unemployment benefits will be extended, we have all had a boss who rewards our long hours of hard work with free company-emblazoned swag which probably cost about 30¢ to make in a third-world country.  Nothing says “Job well done!” during the holidays like a stress ball shaped like a globe.

9.  Who wouldn’t be inclined to tune in to A Christmas Carol that promises acid rain and drugs?!  Despite the footage of international terrorist warfare (too soon?), I think that we can all agree that the Frank Cross’ promo for IBC’s A Christmas Carol was far superior to Eliot Loudermilk’s feel-good, family trailer.

For those who don’t know yet, acclaimed director Ridley Scott is currently working on two prequels to his sci-fi classic, Alien. Scott has expressed disappointment with the path that was taken with the Alien series after the second film, which was directed by James Cameron. While both Cameron and Scott have spoken about the urge to revisit the Alien universe, ultimately, it was Scott who made the first move. Scott has stated in the past that he felt that any sequels should experiment more with the evolution of the physical form of the alien xenomorphs in order to keep the mystery and suspense of the creature from the original film. Scott has also mentioned that he felt the story of the Space Jockey, the fossilized body and apparent victim of a chestburster that the doomed crew of the Nostromo discovered before their fateful encounter with the deadly xenomorphs, would be the proper story to tell in a sequel. According to all reports, this is the story Scott intends to tell with Prometheus, his Alien prequel which currently includes Charlize Theron and Michael Fassbender in its still-forming cast.

As some may already know, the Alien series was my bread and butter as a child. As other boys in my elementary school became obsessed with football or video games or even the fairer sex, my young mind was deeply entrenched in acid blood, secreted resin, and gloriously gory chestbursters. It wasn’t long before I was known as that slightly creepy kid who spent his time drawing the disturbing creatures from a ‘70s sci-fi/horror film and managed to find a way to work the alien xenomorphs into almost every school lesson, despite many teachers’ resistance and confusion.